Intentional Time Together

hinking back, our favorite holiday memories are often the simple times that were made special because of loved ones—looking at holiday lights as a family, hearing grandparents read stories, or conspiring with siblings early Christmas morning. That’s what the holidays are supposed to be about: spending time with those we love; however, the reality is often different as many strive to meet obligations. While the busyness of parties, schools activities, and shopping can take our time, it does not often add meaning to the holiday season. We may think that we don’t have time to spend with friends and family, but research shows that spending time with loved ones actually correlates to longer life expectancy.[i] By relieving stress and creating fond memories, spending time with loved ones may actually give us more time. As the year winds down, be intentional about carving out time to spend with family and loved ones. Here are some ways to use your time with loves ones meaningfully:

• Engage in traditions. Traditions are a great way to feel connected, a sense of belonging, and stability. They also provide a great opportunity to share family memories with the next generation. Keep traditions alive from your childhood, such as watching a Christmas movie as a family on Christmas Eve, or invent new ones based on your family’s interests. If there are too many traditions in your family, think about which ones are most enjoyable to you, and skip the rest.
• Use time with loved ones to reflect. Think about the past year, and make some goals for the new year. If you have children, prompt them to share: what was their favorite memory from this year? What would they like to do as a family next year? What would they like to change? For other loved ones, reflect on memories that you made this year, and thank them for any help they gave you this year. Expressing gratitude is one of the best gifts you can give someone.
• Volunteer together. While volunteering benefits you and your community throughout the year, the holidays often provide more opportunities to volunteer together with friends or family. Serving together helps you focus on giving back at a time when much of the focus is on receiving. According to the United Way, volunteering as a family helps increase communication skills among family members and passes down family values as parents model their beliefs.[ii] You can donate your time by serving at a local food bank or other community center, or you can donate goods as a family, such as food or gently used clothes, toys, and books.